Thursday, December 11, 2008


It's been a while since I posted and not due to any emotional reason, we just switched internet providers and our old modem could not support their system. Typical. So I had to figure it all out, get a new one and then hook it all up. I am actually quite proud of myself...!

But in the meantime we have some amazing news.
(No I am pregnant as every second person tells me I will be shortly. FYI, that's a load of rubbish. Statistically it's simply not true but as all good suburban legends go, everyone knows someone who knows someone who fell pregnant right after adopting. I am not saying it's impossible and one of the blogs I follow had that happen, but statistically it's unlikely. However, I digress.)

Someone close to me know shall remain nameless but is close (wink wink) has offered to be an egg donor for us! Seriously? How unbelievably incredible and amazing. Their generosity astounds me. Although to be honest I would do the same for them. We are close. So anyway!!!! We start the treatment in...pause...January! Yes January that is NEXT month!

In guess the obvious question is how do we feel about treatment and God? because enough Christians have issues with IVF let alone egg donor IVF cycles. So I though I would lay out what we think for what it's worth. But before I do I feel very very strongly that each of us has to go to God in prayer and seek His Face with regards to treatment. What some people feel is ok may not be ok for others. Each of us has to stand before God one day and give an account for the decisions that we have made.
And so we take this very seriously as I would like to be standing before God and hear "Well done good and faithful servant", not "So let's talk about the decisions you made with regard to fertility treatment...!"
I am also not trying to justify the decisions that we have made. We are more than happy that we have prayed and fasted and sought God on this. But I think as someone who has a blog on infertility and is Christian, I owe an explanation of our decision making.

There are several high profile organisations that are against IVF. For the reason (so I believe with the research that I have done) that not all embryos are used in some cases by some couples. Some are frozen, remain frozen and are never given the chance at life. In the States there are millions of frozen embryos and most will be discarded. These organisations believe that these little clusters of cells are life and have the right to a chance at life. We agree. We did IVF with the proviso that we would use each and every embryo no matter how many we got. Unfortunately my body does not produce good quality eggs and so we never had the chance to even freeze any. But we made the choice before we started any cycles at all.

When you get to an egg donor cycle, these organisations are off the chart in terms of disapproval!
They do not agree with donor sperm or donor eggs. And I am not saying whether they are right or wrong. They are well respected and everyone is entitled to their opinion. We would only do this with a close relation for obvious reasons. The same reasons that we will only have an open adoption. The child has the right to knowledge and a relationship with their biological heritage and family. (Please understand that I am not passing judgement on those who may be reading and have done anonymous sperm or egg donor cycles. This is only the decision making process that we went through with God and is specific to us) So as this is the case for us, we are happily accepting with very grateful hearts! Extremely grateful hearts!

This is rather a long post just to say that we have more treatment coming up! But one that is worth an explanation I think. We have always pursued 3 options for a family, a miracle (come on God!), treatment and adoption. I have come to realise that we are not going to have a "normal" family and we are more than fine with it. We are grateful and thankful that God chose us to parent our little boy and are grateful and thankful for the opportunity for more treatment.

Thank you Jesus

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