Wednesday, March 14, 2012

A fool



Yesterday morning I get a text from my darling sister, "call M wen you can". M (Mom) has not been doing so well on chemo. I call and Mom sounds like she's half dead. What is more terrifying is that her chest hurts. She's called the doctor and left a message.

I get the number of her specialist and fire off a rocket. I call the nurses and leave a roaring message. Within 5 minutes the nurse calls and I get her to call my Mom. And an hour later she's in hospital. Turns out her heart is ok, thank God. But she has a severe bacterial infection all the way from her mouth to her gut. And her wound from surgery is not so hot either.

After two doses of morphine her color returns and she eats the first food she has had in a couple of days. She's put on a drip and the treatment starts. X-rays are done and she's made comfortable.

It's hard for my family to understand how bad chemo can be. And the risk is that I seem to be over reacting, I guess. But I will be a fool for my Mom time and again. We lost my father-in-law to chemo. It's full on. The best result could have been that I was a fool. That my Mom was checked out, was given a clean bill of health and discharged. I would be happy to be that fool.

But I was not a fool, unfortunately. And my precious mother is probably going to spend her second night in hospital while they try to get her infection and pain under control. And yet, I am grateful. If you spend any time in a oncology ward, you end up feeling very very grateful. There are a lot of extremely sick people there and my Mom is just doing preventative chemo.

She's be fine, I pray. And her fool is right there, ready to play her role.


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4 comments:

Gail said...

Praying for your mum friend! And praying for you as you too!! That you will be heard.
Not a fool at all - me "over-reacting" saw my dad in hospital several times for good reasons.
Go with your instincts - they are not foolish, they are a result of both experience and a desire to see your mum healthy and well.

Miriam said...

Good for you. Our pride is a major obstacle in standing up and asking for or sometimes demanding what our loved ones need. Sometimes our love for them needs to out weigh our pride.

remaliah said...

Oh I'm so glad you took the precautions to get her checked out! I agree about the instincts...even if we're not always sure if they're clear. I've felt the fool several times in our own (quite different) situation with the girls being born so early and how careful their doctors wanted us to be...coming up against people who literally thought I was overreacting. But taking care and preserving LIFE and doing as much as I can to do so (thankfully also aware of God's miraculous care!) is worth being called a fool, though that sometimes hurts. Praying for peace & strength for all of you x

Neetz said...

It's wonderful that your Mum has you as an advocate! And I know what Chemo's like... I have had it, and the complications that go hand in hand with that..... not nice at all, and when you're in that state, you really NEED an advocate!
Thinking of your Mum and praying for the best outcome!
xx (Juanita).

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