Friday, April 11, 2008

Sliding Doors

This is the craziest road ever. As the news about my fertility has progressively got worse and worse, it takes on an air of unreality. Could this really be my life? I love the movie Sliding Doors and feel like I am honestly living in the movie sometimes. I think that there must be a parallel life running alongside this reality that is in fact my "real" life. A life with a cluster of small children around my knees where to fall pregnant is natural and normal. Sometimes this feeling has been so strong as my life becomes surreal with the continued downhill slide of bad news about my fertility. I have caught myself actually physically looking around and wondering how I got here!

But I have to face the fact that this is where I am right now. This is my life and the life that God has chosen for me here and now. There may be a "better"reality for me in the future but this is it now. It's quite sobering as I have so much to be thankful for. For a start, salvation, and from there God could do nothing more for me my whole life and I would still be incredibly blessed.
So I am grateful for the blessings I have, yes I would love kiddies, but I am blessed here and now. Believe it girl!


Simoney said...

Wow, what a way to start your blog, Sammy! Yes, like you I want to go back and hug April2008Sammy and and tell her "It's going to be OK!!"
I mean, wow. Just look at you now, Mama Sam!!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...