My Saving Grace

I love how much I have discovered about the character of Jesus in the last 6 years, through this journey. He is my source of joy when I think about the pain and misery we have gone through. I love ( and am SOOO grateful) that He saved me but what honestly captures my heart again and again is the man in Jesus.

****theology alert, am trying to express something hard here, so grace and understanding required....!!!*****

He was 100% man and 100% God and the man side of Him was in complete submission to God the Father. That is pretty incredible to me. The (100%) God part of Him knew everything about everything (He's God right?) So the (100%) man part of him must have known what was before Him from the (100%) God side. Jesus knew about the cross and the pain and misery that was to come and still submitted.

That's quite different from me. I mean, you kinda know that what is before you might be hard but you are not sure. I mean, it could all turn out better than you hope and be a walk in the park. But Jesus knew how bad it was going to be. It was not going to be less painful or humiliating than He thought.... AND HE STILL SUBMITTED.

The (100%- Can I stop putting in 100%? I think I have made my point) man part of Jesus, the emotional side freaked out. John 12: 27 uses words in the Message and New Living translation like "storm tossed" and "deeply troubled". In other words freaked out. And He still submitted. Blows my mind. If I had known what this journey was like 6 years ago, I would have run for the hills and (being honest) probably tossed in the towel. Because it was a killer and I know it's not over yet.

I am not God, to everyone's relief- except of course my friends because they would be SO blessed, and I can't see what lies ahead. That enables me to live in the moment and not worry too much about the future. But Jesus, knew what was ahead. He knew that in the short term it was not going to be ok. Yes He knew He would rise up and He knew that He would be with His Father, but He also knew that before that there would be mocking, scorn, rejection and a whole lot of unimaginable pain. Except of course He could imagine it.

He knew.

So when Jesus says that He gets us I know that He does. He knows what it's like to live with pain (emotional or physical) and with seemingly unanswered prayers. He was the ultimate "even if" Hero. Despite the fact that God could save Him from the cross in a heart beat and yet did not, Jesus loved and worshipped and submitted. And He did this all for me and for you, we are the "joy set before Him".

During the bleakest times of our walk, this was the only thing that kept me going. We have a God, a precious Saviour who can relate to us in every way. Jesus knows. He knows what it's like to be me.