Saturday, November 20, 2010

Love and support

A bloggie friend asked me this question. And as I have been asked it a few times, I thought I would answer on here...

Q: How can I be a friend to and support someone going through infertility?

As I have written so much about this, maybe I could point you to a series of posts I have written. The one that really answers the question is this one. A letter I wrote to the people in our world.

And sometimes it helps to understand what infertility is really like too. So here are some posts about the reality of living and walking through infertility:

I started this blog in 2008, about 18 months before Rupi came home so it was in the middle of our struggle with infertility. The pain was pretty raw and there was a sense of unreality about my life. Infertility always felt wrong to me, like something that should have been natural to us, was being denied us. It was an incredibly painful journey for us.

People do deal with infertility in different ways as we are made differently. But every journey involves pain and grief. They are the two common elements.

Infertilty sensitises you. To the normal and natural world. Living in an everyday world was imnpossible sometimes and everyday events and occuranmces were so painful as all they did was highlight your lack. Especially when it came to pregnancy and babies.

It also brings a great deal of shame. Particularly when the issue is with your body. This is an area the enemy really tries to bring defeat in and it's a battle to over come it. I have no idea how people do infertility without God and a suportive church and family. No idea at all.

To make it through infertility I needed support and I needed my friends. They were a lifeline
to me. I love my friends. They stood by me and loved me and prayed for me. I can never say thank you enough.

They helped get me from despair to here.....



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6 comments:

PaisleyJade said...

Thank you!!!

tea said...

Thank you for sharing this, Sammy. I went back and read through every post you linked to. Thank you! <3

Helen said...

TFS Sammy, and big hugs to you. x

Maranga Mai said...

Hey I love it, practical sense. Thanks so much.

Cat said...

love the honesty here Sammy
so important to share our stories
we learn so much from each other
your journey has been painful, but so amazing with so many unexpected gifts...that is what I see the most when I look your way...awesome, unexpected gifts...miracles!

the thing that peirced my heart was when you spoke of the shame....shame, such a dark isolating thing....so glad you had your faith to help you walk through it.

and friends....not enough can be said about supportive friends...such a gift

thanks for the insight tonight Sammy

love and light

These Three Kings said...

Love this post!! Love the wisdom...love you!!

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